Hair: Blonde/strawberry blonde and filling in a bit more
Eyes: Blue/green with some honey color. I’m still unsure what color he truly has!
Clothes: Some 6 month, but 9 months are fitting best, especially with cloth diapers and outfits with long pants
Diapers: We do a mix of cloth and disposables (size 3)
Sleeping: We hit a rough patch for a few days a couple weeks ago where he was up every 2 hours all night long, but he’s gotten better. Some nights are 6-7 hour stretches and then back to sleep for another 3-4 hours. Most days he is only taking 2 naps now since his naps are, on average, 1-1.5 hours long. Naps are still in our arms. He is usually awake for 3-4 hours before bedtime.
Likes: Rolling around, riding in shopping carts, watching himself in the mirror, balloons, The Wheels on the Car song (our own version of wheels on the bus), riding swings and slides, watching cars go by, watching and trying to touch Pepper, sitting up, seeing me and Conrad when we each get home from work, playing with his toys, his fox and new kangaroo stuffed animals, Sofie the giraffe, stroller rides, watching people. He’s just the happiest baby all the time (unless he’s tired, but even then he’s just a little fussy)
Dislikes: being left to play on his own for more than a couple minutes, falling over onto his toys when reaching for something, riding in the car at night
Eating: Still nursing (or a bottle while I’m at work) roughly every 2-2.5 hours (sometimes more often if a nap falls in the middle). He is eating 2 solid meals per day and a snack. He usually gets fruit or yogurt in the morning and a veggie/meat (or fruit and oatmeal) at night. Still eating purees with a few small pieces of very soft food from my plate. He still gags sometimes and even threw up the other night from gagging on a thicker puree, so he’s definitely not ready for actual pieces of food yet.
Milestones: Rolling to get somewhere, big boy convertible car seat, saying Mamama, grabbing smaller objects easily, scooting all over the room on his belly
Eyes: Blue/green with some honey color. I’m still unsure what color he truly has!
Clothes: 6 month, some 6-9 is starting to fit
Diapers: We do a mix of cloth and disposables (size 2, soon to be 3)
Sleeping: He’s doing great at night! Nurses to sleep, usually sleeps for 6-7 hours before waking for a diaper change and snack, then back to sleep. Some nights are shorter stretches of sleep (3-4 hours), but for the most part he’s doing really well. He wakes up 1-2 times a night, but some nights doesn’t wake at all. He totals 10-12 hours every night. He takes a nap after being awake for 2 hours; they are not at specific times yet, as he wakes up different times in the morning and has varying length nap times. Naps are still in our arms, but I’m hoping to get him into his crib for them soon.
Likes: Watching cars go by, watching and trying to touch Pepper, kicking on the counter before bath time, silly noises, banging on things, peaches and plums, sitting up, being carried, playing with his toys, looking in the mirror, trees, his racecar counting book, Sofie the giraffe, stroller rides, the moon, watching people. I’m pretty sure he just loves life, as he’s so happy all the time!
Dislikes: being left to play on his own for more than a couple minutes, falling over while sitting, riding in the car at night, loud sounds (baby bullet, vacuum, the train going by when we were at the farmers’ market), waiting for me while I pump in the mornings/after work.
Eating: Nursing roughly every 2-2.5 hours (sometimes more often if a nap falls in the middle). He is eating 2 solid meals per day and I am going to start adding in lunch. He usually gets fruit in the morning and a veggie (or fruit and oatmeal) at night. Recently he seems to like everything he tries. I bought some yogurt today for him to try and lots of fresh fruit to puree and freeze. It’s so simple to spend less than an hour making a bunch of purees, freeze them, and then easily pop whatever I want to give him into the microwave or refrigerator to defrost. We had him tested for nut and fish allergies (Conrad is allergic to peanuts and his dad to shellfish) a couple weeks ago and he passed with flying colors! And he likes peanut butter!
Milestones: Getting much steadier with sitting on his own, eating well, grabbing objects very easily, putting objects off to the side and then reaching for them, starting to throw things, getting his first tooth!
Height: About 27 inches (pediatrician appointment is Monday)
Hair: Super blonde
Eyes: Blue with some honey color in the middle
Clothes: 6 month
Diapers: We do a mix of cloth and disposables
Sleeping: We hit a bit of a rough patch last week, but seem to have gotten over it. Bradley usually wakes up half an hour to an hour after going to sleep, falls right back to sleep as soon as I nurse him, then sleeps a nice long chunk of time. The other night he slept for 9 straight hours, but last night he woke up once in the middle of 11 hours. He likes to sleep on his side and has started rolling to his belly to sleep.
Likes: Watching cars go by, butterflies, bath time, silly noises, banging on things, trying food, sitting up, being carried, playing peek-a-boo, looking in the mirror
Dislikes: being left to play on his own for more than a couple minutes
Eating: Nursing roughly every 2 hours (sometimes more often if a nap falls in the middle). He started trying solids this weekend! We started with avocado (he wasn’t a fan) and had peas today. He liked the peas! I’ve decided to make his food and it is so easy with the baby bullet. I like knowing exactly what he is eating and saving money!
Milestones: Sitting up on his own! He still falls over so we sit behind him, but he’s doing really well with it. Eating solids, tracking moving objects really well, jumping in his jumper
I absolutely cannot believe that Bradley is 6 months old already. Halfway to a year. The past 6 months have absolutely flown by and have continued to just get better and better. Bradley is such a happy little guy. He’s easy going, smiles a ton, and definitely has a sense of humor; he laughs when we’re being silly and he does things that he knows are silly. I love spending my days with him. Which brings us to a big change: I got a job. I’ll be working as a part time office assistant in the Little Silver Boro office. It’s only 4 hours a day, 5 days a week and my mom will be watching Bradley Monday-Thursday (Conrad is off on Fridays). I’m a nervous wreck over this. I was planning on looking for a job in the fall, but this job came about, so I applied, interviewed, and got it. I don’t want to leave Bradley yet. I know I can trust my mom to take care of him, but I’m worried about how he’s going to adjust. I currently nurse him to sleep for his naps and he sleeps in my arms. He hasn’t had a bottle since he was about 2 months old and it was a struggle. I’m torn between having him learn a bottle or just moving to a sippy cup at this point, but either way is not going to be relaxing for him to fall asleep with (when he was brand new and we had to supplement with a bottle of breastmilk, it always made him wake up more). I really really love being a stay at home mom, but I know that getting a job right now is important. It isn’t a ton of income, but Conrad and I would like to start looking for a house next summer and know that my income will at least help us get a decent mortgage (WHY is NJ, especially Monmouth County, so expensive?!). I keep telling myself that I’m doing this for Bradley, so we can buy a nice house for him to grow up in. Once we have a second child, I will probably stay home again if we can swing it, since childcare for 2 children will be too expensive.
The other big change around here is that Bradley started solids! We started a few days before 6 months, on Sunday, since Conrad wanted to be home for it. We started with avocado mashed up and thinned out with breastmilk. Bradley’s face made it clear that he did not like it! He gladly took the spoon, but spit out the avocado. I only gave him a few tastes since I didn’t want to torture the poor boy. He had the same reaction the next day. On Tuesday (day 3), I put a small chunk of frozen avocado in a silicone feeder and he seemed to like it a little more. I think this was a result of the cold feeling good on his gums (no sign of teeth yet but LOTS of teething) and the fact that super cold things have a duller flavor.
Today Bradley tried pureed peas mixed with breastmilk. He loved them and kept looking for more! His face definitely has a confused look, but that’s due to the consistency of something thicker than milk. He ate most of the little bowl I made for him and then I stopped because I didn’t want to overload his little belly. Tomorrow I’ll probably feed it all to him if he wants it.
Making and feeding Bradley solid food is already so fun. I love seeing his reactions and feeling proud of how well he’s doing with it. This also means that he’s no longer exclusively breastfed. He will continue to get all of his nutrition from nursing until he’s a year old, but from here on out, he’ll start eating something new every few days and learning all different tastes and textures. It’s bittersweet for me. I love the fact that my body has been able to provide our baby with all of the nutrition he’s needed from the minute he was born. In fact, I’m in awe. My body didn’t work the right way to conceive him, but once I got pregnant, it started to work. I had a great pregnancy but still worried I wouldn’t be able to breastfeed. It was so important to me to be able to nurse my baby to give him the best nutrition possible and to feel that bond between mother and child. The beginning was rough with his tongue and lip ties, silent reflux, my Raynaud’s, and mastitis. But we made it through and I’m so proud of us both. Because of everything we went through to have Bradley, being able to nurse him has meant so much more to me. The bond we have while nursing is amazing and I just love watching how sweet he is. So why is this bittersweet? I’m thrilled that he’s growing so well, learning so much, and thriving, but I’m sad that he’s growing up so fast! I didn’t think 6 months could go by so quickly.
I look forward to watching our sweet boy grow up, but for now I’m going to savor every single minute of him being a snuggly baby.
Diapers: We’re in cloth! Bradley easily goes for 2 hours in a cloth diaper without feeling wet, as opposed to instantly feeling it and wanting to be changed while wearing a disposable. Nighttime is still disposables because they’re easier to change in the dark. He’s size 2 in those.
Sleeping: I don’t want to jinx anything, but we’ve been having some great sleep! Sunday night he slept for almost 10 hours without waking up! Last night he slept for 12 hours with just 1 wake up. Woohoo! About an hour and 15 minutes after waking, he takes a nap and then I try for a nap every 1.5-2 hours. He gets 3-4 naps a day that vary in length depending on where he’s sleeping (car, stroller, my arms, or crib). They range from 30 minutes to 2 hours (in my arms). Bed is between 8 and 8:30.
Likes: Kisses on his cheeks, marching/dancing while being held, when I “throw” him in the air (don’t worry, he doesn’t even leave my hands!), banging things on his highchair, chewing his (and other people’s) fingers, his new ball, watching and petting Pepper, looking at the world around him, grabbing hair, playing peek-a-boo
Dislikes: My parents’ pool (hopefully he’ll like it by the end of summer!), not being able to reach Pepper
Eating: Every 2 hours during the day for 5-10 minutes total
Milestones: Looking when his name is called, focusing on things, lots of talking with consonants and vowels, eating his toes, lasting longer with whatever activity he’s doing, pulling his bottom lip in like an old man, sleeping better, rolling to his side for sleep, getting things to his mouth easily, scooting to a laying down position from sitting against something
Weight: 14lbs 8oz (just over 25% judging by my own reading of the chart; pediatrician appointment is on Monday)
Height: 25.5 inches (almost 75%)
Hair: Strawberry blonde and definitely growing in more
Eyes: Blue/grey with some honey color in the middle
Clothes: 3-6 and 6 month
Diapers: Size 2. We tried on his first 2 cloth diapers the other day. Time to hook up the sprayer before I need to clean a dirty diaper. We’ll start using them more frequently once that’s hooked up.
Sleeping: He goes to bed between 7:30-8:30 most nights. For a couple weeks he was having a very rough time with falling asleep (or rather staying asleep when we’d put him in his crib) and was waking up every 2 hours. I believe it was a growth spurt combined with sleep regression. Once he hit 16 weeks, he started sleeping better again. The other night he slept for an 8 hour stretch! That was a fluke though and he’s since been getting, on average, 5, 3, and 2-3 hour stretches, equaling about 11 hours every night. He still eats whenever he wakes up. About an hour and a half after waking, he takes a 45-60 minute nap and then I try for a nap every 2 hours. He’s still not good at napping in the afternoons. We’re going to start lightly sleep training him with methods we found that do not include letting him cry it out.
Likes: Kisses on his cheeks, when we smile at and talk to him, talking/yelling to us, taking a bath and trying to grab the water coming out of the faucet, standing/bouncing with our help, looking at the world around him, when we sing to him, swatting at/grabbing the toys on his playmat
Dislikes: Getting out of the bath, naps
Eating: Every 2-3 hours during the day for 5-10 minutes total
Milestones: Lots of talking to us and smiling all the time, raspberries, holding his head up really well, reaching for and touching/grabbing everything in sight, starting to laugh, touching his toes, petting Pepper. He rolled over from back to belly a couple times last week but hasn’t attempted to since.
Hair: Strawberry blonde, especially his eyelashes. It’s coming in more on top and a little thicker in back
Eyes: Dark blue/gray
Clothes: 0-3 months, 3 months, but no feet! 3-6 month footy outfits fit perfectly (only reason I’m ok with cooler weather the next few days; I have a bunch of cute outfits I thought he wouldn’t get to wear!)
Diapers: Size 1 still, but starting to get smaller. We’ll move on to 2s when we run out
Sleeping: We got on an earlier schedule, thank goodness! He goes to bed between 8:30-9, sleeps until 3ish, gets a new diaper and eats, then back to sleep for another 5-6 hours. Depending on how much sleep he got, he might go back for another hour or 2, but if not, he takes a roughly 45 minute nap an hour and a half after waking up. Still working on longer naps though; this boy doesn’t want to miss anything! He’s the king the kitten naps (too short to be cat naps)
Likes: When we smile at and talk to him, talking/yelling to us, eating, taking a bath, standing/bouncing with our help, bouncing on the yoga ball, walks in his stroller with the actual stroller seat and not his car seat
Dislikes: Getting out of the bath, being hot, staying in one spot for too long, naps
Eating: Every 2-3 hours during the day, but the major part is that he only eats for about 10 minutes total now! I’ve gained HOURS back to my days. So happy we got his tongue and lip ties fixed…he eats like a champ now
Milestones: Lots of talking to us and smiling all the time! Holding his head up really well, reaching for some objects, looking at everything around him
Two years ago, Conrad and I were “trying” on our own with temperature charting, as advised by my first fertility specialist. That didn’t work. One year ago, I was taking Estradiol in preparation for an embryo transfer that would happen mid-May. Today, my 12 week old baby is happily cooing in his swing behind me. What a difference a year or two can make. National Infertility Awareness Week: a week where many women decide to come out with their story of suffering through infertility. But many women remain silent, as they are embarrassed or ashamed by their issue. A year ago in February, I decided to go public with our infertility struggle on my blog, which I had been writing in Microsoft Word for a couple of months, just for my own benefit of remembering everything. Writing became cathartic as I put my feelings into written words. Going public was so relieving and brought so much support that I never expected. It informed my readers how much is really involved in fertility treatments. It also brought forth more people than I hoped that were going through the same journey and hadn’t told anyone; for some I gave them courage to tell others, and for some I gave them hope. For all, I sent up some prayers that we would all be successful in creating and growing our families, for this is not a club anyone wants to be a part of.
Infertility never leaves you. Just because I had a baby does not erase the fact that we couldn’t get pregnant on our own. Conrad and I are in a “funny” place right now. When we first got married, we weren’t ready to start a family so we prevented pregnancy (although I guess we didn’t need to). The next two years were spent trying to get pregnant. Now we’re back to preventing it. They say you’re super fertile after giving birth, even a lot of times for women with PCOS. I don’t know, and will never know, if this holds true for me. For one, I’m not ready to be pregnant again just yet or have two babies so close in age, and two, we have our 2 snowflake babies (frozen embryos) waiting to join our family over the next few years. We would like to have 3 kids and will definitely be transferring those embryos. If I were to get pregnant naturally, we could potentially have 4 children, which is not our plan. If God blesses us with a surprise after our other 2 snowflakes, then of course we would be happy. But kids are expensive! Four kids is just too expensive for us to afford and still be able to live the life we would like with traveling, a nice house, and being able to do fun activities without having to question whether or not we’ll be able to afford it.
As happy and blessed as we are that we have our 2 snowflakes waiting for us, it’s still nerve-wracking to think that they might not take. What if they don’t implant? Am I missing my chance right now at being fertile and getting pregnant naturally? These questions go through my head ALL.THE.TIME. A part of me is also sad that I’ll never be able to surprise Conrad one day with a pregnancy announcement. On the same note, we get to experience the joy of seeing each 5-day-old embryo as it’s transferred to me; who gets to see that?! We also know that our 2 snowflakes are genetically normal and healthy and we know their genders (no, I won’t be sharing what they are until each pregnancy, and no, we didn’t, nor will we in the future, choose which gender to transfer. Still leaving a little bit of this up to God).
Earlier today, I was Facebook messaging with a friend…well, a distant (by marriage a few times) family member in another country. She told me that she and her husband have been trying to get pregnant for 10 years. 10 YEARS. They’ve seen multiple doctors, who can’t find anything wrong with them, and in turn, will not proceed with any treatments. I guess they’ve never heard of “unexplained infertility”? It absolutely breaks my heart knowing that they’ve been trying for so long, have sought help, and have been denied. I wish she lived here so I could send her to my amazing doctors.
This also made me think about how it took us just about 2 years of travelling down this awful, bumpy, pothole-filled, hellish, but totally worth it road to get to our beautiful baby boy. It doesn’t matter if it takes 6 months or 10+ years; the pain is the same month after month, failed cycle after failed cycle. The tears are the same. The anger is the same. The questions are the same. The hope is the same. That is, if you’re able to hold on to that one little shred of hope. The hope that grows a bit at the start of each treatment and the hope that is torn away when it doesn’t work.
Infertility is a road no one should have to travel. It is a road that too many people these days are on. Why? Is it something in the food we eat or the air we breathe? Why are there so many people, both men and women, suffering from it now? Was it the same percentage of people in the past but now seems like more because our population has grown? I’m not sure anyone knows the answer to that yet.
As I wrap up this post, I want to remind you to think before asking someone questions like: Why don’t you have kids yet? When are you going to have a baby? Aren’t you going to give your child a sibling? They may answer politely with a smile, but inside, they could be crying, with their hope dying a little more each time a similar question is asked. If you know someone struggling to get pregnant, just listen. Don’t offer advice. Just listen and be a shoulder to cry on. My thoughts and prayers are with everyone suffering through infertility, this week, and always.